He was trying to find some help in the ancient military journals of General Tacticus, and had actually found a section headed What to Do If One Army Occupies a Well-fortified and Superior Ground and the Other Does Not, but since the first sentence read "Endeavour to be the one inside" he'd rather lost heart.

Terry Pratchett, Carpe Jugulum

At this point, we could go two ways. There is the easy way, and that is very easy.

You'll never know about the hard way.



Terry Pratchett, The Fifth Elephant

And when a commander of the Watch is unhappy, he tends to spread it around with a big shovel.



Terry Pratchett, The Fifth Elephant

Several hundred dwarfs, four abreast, were trotting across the white plain towards them. There was, Vimes thought, something very determined about them.

'Detritus?'

'Yessir?'

'Try not to look too troll-like, will you?'

'Tryin' like hell, sir.'



Terry Pratchett, The Fifth Elephant

All Hell hadn't been let loose. It was merely Detritus. But from a few feet away you couldn't tell the difference.



Terry Pratchett, The Fifth Elephant

He walked forward, hesitated, said 'No, this is Tuesday,' and moved his descending foot so that it landed on a stone that in every respect appeared to be exactly the same as its fellows.*



*Except that the ones around it were not good stones to tread on if it was a Tuesday.



Terry Pratchett, The Fifth Elephant

There was a long, very long-drawn-out growl, not changing in tone at all, just unrolling a deep promise of what would happen if he tried to move.



Terry Pratchett, The Fifth Elephant

Vimes knew that he had lost. He had lost as soon as Sybil was involved, because she was always a reliable siege engine against the walls of his defences. But there was such a thing as going down fighting.



Terry Pratchett, The Fifth Elephant

Vimes sighed and looked down at the pages of scrawl in his notebook under the heading 'Uberwald'. He wasn't-strictly aware of it, but he treated even geography as if he was investigating a crime ('Did you see who carved out the valley? Would you recognize that glacier if you saw it again?').



Terry Pratchett, The Fifth Elephant

The wizards were civilized men of considerable education and culture. When faced with being inadvertently marooned on a desert island they understood immediately that the first thing to do was to place the blame.



Terry Pratchett, The Last Continent

When you're trying to carry a struggling temple maiden and a sack of looted temple goods in one had and fight off half a dozen angry priests with the other there is little time for reflection.



Terry Pratchett, Interesting Times

Natural selection saw to it that professional heroes who at a crucial moment tended to ask themselves questions like "What is my purpose in life?" very quickly lacked both.



Terry Pratchett, Interesting Times

There was this to be said about Cohen. If there was no reason for him to kill you, such as you having any large amount of treasure or being between him and somewhere where wanted to get to, then he was good company.



Terry Pratchett, Interesting Times

'Well, we are wizards,' said Ridcully. 'We're supposed to meddle with things we don't understand. If we hung around waitin' till we understood things we'd never get anything done.'



Terry Pratchett, Interesting Times

Vimes would be first to admit that he wasn't a good copper, but he'd probably be spared a chore because lots of other people would happily admit that for him.



Terry Pratchett, Men at Arms

When it's time to stop living, I will certainly make Death my number one

choice! (Rincewind)



Terry Pratchett, The Last Continent

Natural selection saw to it that professional heroes who at a crucial

moment tended to ask themselves questions like "What is my purpose in

life?" very quickly lacked both.



Terry Pratchett, Interesting Times